


Daddy's Happy

by twitchtipthegnawer



Category: Beetlejuice - All Media Types
Genre: Anal Fingering, Cunnilingus, Dirty Talk, Dominant!Barbara Maitland, Femdom, Hand Jobs, Multi, Scent Kink, Shapeshifting, Vaginal Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-06
Updated: 2020-03-06
Packaged: 2021-03-01 00:27:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,073
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23036257
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/twitchtipthegnawer/pseuds/twitchtipthegnawer
Summary: Which was weirder: All the ways in which ghost sex was different from human sex, or all the ways in which it was exactly the same? Adam couldn't answer that question, but he was developing a theory that the precise combination of similarities and discrepancies was actually the perfect recipe for. Ah, in polite terms, "A good time."He was not going to be sharing this theory with Barbara any time soon, out of embarrassment. And he wouldn't be sharing it with Beetlegeuse, because the demon would only respond by making things even weirder.
Relationships: Adam Maitland/Barbara Maitland, Beetlejuice/Adam Maitland, Beetlejuice/Adam Maitland/Barbara Maitland, Beetlejuice/Barbara Maitland
Comments: 7
Kudos: 138





	Daddy's Happy

The thing about Beetlegeuse was, Adam and Barbara _meant_ it when they said he smelled bad. Not the way that _people_ smelled bad, though, no body odor or stale sweat to be seen. No, Beetlegeuse smelled _cold,_ and _damp,_ like grave dirt.

So at the very least, he didn’t smell _good._ But Adam had to admit, right at the moment, he wasn’t particularly bothered. His chest heaved, his face buried into a paper-pale shoulder, and he gulped great breaths of that cool scent. He felt feverish, and needed anything _cold_ he could get his, er, cold, dead hands on.

“Hell yeah baby, that’s it,” Beetlegeuse moaned, theatrical and insincere, and Adam shuddered anyway when the fingers inside him _twisted._

“Oh, goodness,” Barbara exclaimed. She sounded exactly the same way she had when Adam had surprised her by buying some brand-new wallpaper to replace their bedroom’s peeling paint. Delighted, and a little bit turned on.

Adam wasn’t the _most_ self aware, but even he recognized the irony there. That they had gone from so perfectly tame _(vanilla,_ Beetlegeuse called them) to… _this._

Beetlegeuse had Adam sitting in his lap, and while Adam couldn’t see his face (wasn’t going to look up, not _now)_ he could hear the smug smile in his voice. “Always knew you’d be a perfect little bottom bitch.”

“Well now, that’s not very ni - ah!”

Every time Adam thought he might assert himself, Beetlegeuse went and _thrust_ his fingers in! It was filthy, made a squishy, wet sound that had Adam blushing brighter than Beetlegeuse’s vulgar words. And it felt _good._ Of course, Adam knew what the prostate was, but he’d never actually _experimented_ with it. The feeling of being stretched, filled, and then those little shocks in between - it was overwhelming.

Barbara was right behind him, which Adam had been thankful for, earlier. His wife always had his back! But with the humiliation and arousal growing in his gut, he was starting to feel like -

“You really _do_ enjoy it,” Barbara was clearly _delighted._ Adam half regretted ever allowing this door to be opened, except now that he was here, he couldn’t stand the thought of closing it.

“‘Course he does, babe, any man’d be delighted to have these babies inside him!” Beetlegeuse wriggled the fingers of his free hand in Adam’s peripheral vision, until they were caught by Barb’s hand, grabbing his wrist. “What’re you - ”

Though Adam couldn’t quite see it, he certainly _heard_ the wet noise of Barbara taking Beetlegeuse’s fingers into her mouth. He heard Beetlegeuse inhale sharply, completely genuine and disarmed. He was always like that, when someone touched him, like he kept expecting them to slip straight through him. And that reminder had Adam moving, too.

Not his hips - too embarrassing, still. No, he turned his face just a bit and mouthed at Beetlegeuse’s throat softly. He wanted to bite, knew Beetlegeuse would like it (like Adam liked it, Barb’s teeth digging in hard, Beetlegeuse with sharp fangs hovering threateningly) but, he just. He kept thinking, what if it _hurts,_ and he knew Beetlegeuse would like that, too, but. But!

Somehow, Beetlegeuse managed to shove a fourth finger into Adam’s ass, and he couldn’t overthink anything at all. He just latched on, arms shaking around Beetlegeuse’s shoulders. His mouth moved whenever he remembered to make it, and his eyes, oddly, felt hot. Barbara was lukewarm against his spine, Beetlegeuse cool on his chest.

Sex with ghosts was _weird._

It got weirder. Beetlegeuse turned him around in his lap, so that Adam was facing his wife. He wondered, briefly, if this was because the demon had been getting overwhelmed with all the attention lavished on him, too. He couldn’t wonder for long because, now that Barb had access to his front, she was going to make sure that _he_ was more overwhelmed than ever.

At least Beetlegeuse stopped fingering me, Adam thought, just before he was coaxed upwards and promptly speared on a cock.

Mouth gaping open, Adam could _feel_ the embarrassing squeal that came out, more than hear it. Barbara squeezed his cock the same way she’d squeezed Beetlegeuse’s wrist just a minute ago, and Adam could hardly even feel it.

Beetlegeuse wasn’t as big as he was, he didn’t think. It wasn’t like they’d measured, exactly. Just, he’d been very close to him, and, well. If this was what Beetlegeuse felt like, how could Barbara ever handle sex? It was _so much,_ he felt sure that his belly must be showing it somehow - yet, when he looked down, there was nothing. Well, there were Beetlegeuse’s legs, inhumanly pale and dusted with green hair.

And there was Barb’s hand, flushed pink in a strange facsimile of life, jerking him off. There was Barb’s chest, heaving deep breaths as she fought off some kind of emotion. Lovely and soft, so much so he reached out to cup one breast without thinking about it. Force of habit. Her green eyes were shining, bright and delighted, and she didn’t look away as she moved, even when his own eyes rolled back into his head.

“Oh, _fuck_ yeah.” Beetlegeuse bucked his hips, jolting Adam’s whole body up and down. “That’s the stuff. Think you could handle more?”

“What?” Adam sounded so dazed, even to his own ears.

Leaning forward, Barbara kissed him. It was gentle, slow, but didn’t linger long before she was murmuring into his lips, and addressing Beetlegeuse. “You’re all the way inside him, aren’t you?”

“Well, _yeah,”_ Beetlegeuse said. He _tried_ for nonchalant, but Adam’s body clenched around him, and he came across more _strangled._ “But I’ve always got a trick or two up my sleeve.”

With Barbara’s lips still brushing his, Adam found himself trying to muffle the surprised moan when he felt Beetlegeuse _move._ It was like - no, he was - his dick _grew,_ and while Adam knew he could shapeshift. Of course he knew, with how often Beetlegeuse indulged. It was just, somehow Adam hadn’t thought Beetlegeuse would shapeshift _there._

“So cute,” Barbara murmured.

“Fuckin’ _tight,_ babe!” Beetlegeuse delighted.

Her questing fingers slipped down from Adam’s cock. She rolled his balls in her palm, for a moment, which had him drooling out a long string of precome. Then she went lower still, gentle fingertips touching the place where Beetlegeuse was fucking him. She could feel how wide he was stretched, Adam realized, and his dick twitched again.

For a long moment, there was just Adam, getting bounced on a cock he was sure was _much_ bigger now, and shaped oddly, too, he didn’t think there was quite the same texture before, and he could feel something - something _building,_ not quite an orgasm. It started in his _toes,_ had the sides of his mouth tingling, of all things. He almost didn’t catch Barbara suddenly pulling away and saying, “Wait, wait.”

“Hff - what, sweetheart, you wanna get on this dick too? Sorry, you’ve gotta wait your turn.”

“No,” Barbara gently guided Adam’s head out of the way, and then kissed Beetlegeuse. The demon was so surprised, and her husband so lax and shuddery with pleasure, that she was free to manipulate them how she wanted. And what she wanted, apparently, was to spread Beetlegeuse’s legs _wider,_ until he whined into her kiss.

The next noise he made, he sounded like someone had just punched him in the solar plexus. Barb had straddled Adam’s lap and sat herself down on his dick, which in turn made Adam’s ass tighten and a tear leak out of one eye. Beetlegeuse dug his nails into Adam’s hips, hissed as if he was trying to get his breath back, and growled, “You might be incorporeal but you two are heavy as _fuck.”_

“What’s the matter?” Barbara nipped Adam’s neck, reached her arms past him to stroke nails down Beetlegeuse’s sides. “Can’t handle both of us?”

Of course, all it took was issuing the challenge to have him bucking up into Adam once more. Each thrust jostled Barb, too, until she was moaning prettier than any of the pornos Adam had been able to get past his guilt about watching in his youth. Granted, that hadn’t been many, but still. He didn’t think even the best actress could measure up to his wife.

Then, he didn’t think _at all._ Barbara was tight and wet and hot, her muscles contracting and releasing faster than he could keep up with. Someone kissed him, someone pulled his hair, someone pinched his nipples and _twisted_ and someone was crying out, but he didn’t know which of them it was.

Holding off was a struggle, but Adam desperately wanted not to come first. _Please, please, please, feels so good, so so good, but just a little longer. Just a little -_

Adam should’ve known better. The more he tried not to come, the more he focused on how hard it was not to, and well. It was a forgone conclusion.

He went twitchy between them, his toes curling and hands clinging to whatever they could reach. Beetlegeuse’s thigh, Barbara’s waist. He was stuttering out a name but all he felt was the “B” sound, his brain gone too fuzzy to really compute much.

Beetlegeuse, predictably, didn’t let up for even a second. If anything, he redoubled his efforts. Somewhere in the middle of the next flurry of thrusts, it went from almost-too-much, to the _bad_ kind of painful. Barbara must’ve heard the cadence of his whimpers change, because Beetlegeuse was stuttering to a stop, and when Adam opened his eyes he saw her hand fisted in his purple locks and yanking his head to the side.

“Alright, alright, let up already!” Beetlegeuse whined.

She did, but only after helping Adam out of Beetlegeuse’s lap. Adam collapsed onto the empty stretch of mattress Barb laid him down on, but he still lazily turned his head to ogle Beetlegeuse and his wife.

Eager as ever, Beetlegeuse tried to pin Barbara down, undoubtedly planning to get his cock somewhere warm as fast as possible. Adam caught himself smiling at the way Barbara caught his shoulders and dug her nails in, the perfect strategy to get Beetlegeuse still again. She trailed those nails under his chin, a smirk on her lips, and said, “Eat me out first.”

“Yes Mommy,” Beetlegeuse said, with a whimper that sounded fake as hell but might as well just have covered up an entirely genuine reaction.

Made sense. Adam could feel himself blushing already, at _that_ particular pet name, and he _knew_ he would whimper if Barb had given him an order like that. She’d changed a _lot_ after dying.

What happened next seemed almost hazy, to Adam. He knew that Beetlegeuse bowed his head between Barb’s spread thighs, buried his nose in her dark blonde curls and sniffed loudly enough to be obnoxious. Still, the open indulgence in something many people considered taboo made Adam and Barb both squirm, and Beetlegeuse knew it.

Adam heard Barbara’s moans crescendo, heard the loud slurping noises Beetlegeuse made. He wasn’t sure how long it was, but it seemed between one blink and the next they had moved, and Beetlegeuse’s sloppy mouth was lolling open, his purple-ish tongue inhumanly long as it lolled out of his mouth. Barbara was jerking him off, much the same way she’d done with Adam earlier. Except, Beetlegeuse was wet with the lube that had been _inside_ Adam, and that was.

Without even thinking, Adam crawled over, and found himself lapping at Beetlegeuse’s lips before he knew it. He could feel the bed rock with Beetlegeuse’s hips, heard Barb mutter encouragements. What finally got him off, though, was Barbara saying, “Beetlegeuse, _come on.”_

“Fuck!” The demon striped his belly and chest with come, which Adam dragged his fingers through curiously. It was almost tingly, as well as being slick. Odd. “Fuck, fuck, that’s good.”

They all caught their breath together, for a minute, and then Barbara was getting up onto all fours over the two of them. She started to say, “Next time - ”

“Really?” Beetlegeuse’s head shot up to stare at her. “You mean it? Oh, I’ll be _so_ good - ”

She cut him off in return, and continued, “Next time, I’m going to be the one to finger you.”

This, finally, got Beetlegeuse to shut up. His mouth closed with an audible _snap,_ and two high spots of pink appeared on his soft cheeks. Barbara pointedly looked at Adam, winked, and said, “I mean it.”

**Author's Note:**

> The first Beej fic I write... the last Beej fic I post.... it has all gone full circle.
> 
> (I might write more someday. Who knows.)


End file.
